Marriage ain't easy, but that doesn't mean it's not funny. "Marriage is like a walk in the park… Jurassic Park." The speaker could even customize the word "old" to make more sense for the couple (bad with technology would be a funny substitute!). Why not? She’s so white, cold, and expensive, she might as well be the Winter Olympics.The subset of husband-jabs-delivered-by-wives jokes is always a crowd pleaser (sorry, husbands), but of course this joke could be re-gendered to work for any couple.
He’s finally getting his neck circumcised. “Mitch McConnell isn’t here tonight, he had a prior engagement.But I believe it was great Ted Kennedy who said ‘Wow! That’s crazy! I murdered a woman.’ Chappaquiddick, in theaters now.” They were like ‘A woman’s probably not going to jerk off in front of anyone, right?’ And to that I say: Don’t count your chickens.” On the #MeToo movement: “It’s probably the reason I’m here.“Mike Pence is what happens when Anderson Cooper isn’t gay.”.Calling a Nazi a ‘white nationalist’ is like calling a pedophile a ‘kid friend,’ or Harvey Weinstein a ‘ladies man,’ which isn’t really fair - he also likes plants.” He loves white nationalists, which is a weird term for a Nazi. I think you might be rich in Idaho, but in New York you’re doing fine.”
President, I don’t think you’re very rich. “It is kinda crazy that the Trump campaign was in contact with Russia, while the Hillary campaign wasn’t even in contact with Michigan.”.Wolf walked up to the podium in a see-through shirt under a tasteful pantsuit and delivered her opening remark: “Like a porn star says when she’s about to have sex with a Trump, let’s get this over with.” The comedian went after Trump for being sexist, a white supremacist, and poor. I’ve seen many WHCD sets, and I don’t recall John Hodgman having jokes about what it looks like when Jake Tapper comes. “And if 2017 taught us anything, it’s ‘Hey, that means women.’” If Wolf is any indication, what women have to say is downright filthy. “If 2016 taught us anything, it’s that we should be listening more to people outside of Washington,” said White House Correspondents’ Association president Margaret Talev. But this is an administration woefully bereft of chill, so once again, another former Daily Show correspondent hosted the affair, comedian Michelle Wolf. The yearly gathering used to be a time when the media and White House staffers could come together and chill. Just like last year, a certain alleged president skipped the White House Correspondents’ Dinner. Michelle Wolf at the 2018 White House Correspondents’ Dinner.